So it has been awhile

I have decided I am going to attempt to bring back this blog and see where it takes me. I know no one really reads it, but I want to put something out there that isn't my livejournal (which no one will ever have access to because I rant and whine only on it). I want to put myself out there as much as I can, without out telling too much at the same time. It is my attempt to bring me back to honesty and document myself. So here it goes.

I am sick.

Not just in the "I am mentally sick" but also in I may be possibly by physically sick.

I tested positive for Hepatitis C in December 2010. I am 21.

I don't know what this means for my future, what it will do in the long run, but I tested positive for the anti-bodies and when a second test was run I tested negative.

I don't know what to do.

It is something I think no one is really looking to hear when they go to the doctor. What could be wrong with you. I was in a funk for awhile (and sometime get back in) when I think about it. I am young, slightly healthy. What could cause it?

Possibly the other aspect of me that is "sick."

I've been a cutter for 8 years. Since 2003 I started and have gone in and out of 'recovery.' It is a hard habit to kick, and in the past months I have had to experience some rough times with it. But it is what it is, and I have to accept it for what it is.

I want this blog to keep talking about my work in the community (which is now focused on education), but it will be in the back drop of my personal state right now. A young woman who is a recovering cutter, possible positive Hep C person, and mostly lesbian but bisexual Southerner. I want to be honest with myself and others for once. Or at least try to.